A Hitler to Spare

The intersection of the real world with the fantastic is what makes a great superhero comic to me. Comics can tell wonderful true life stories and historical fictions such as Hudini The Handcuff King, but when it comes to superheroes, I don't need realism. I prefer every aspect of the real world touched by the superheroes to become stranger and, in my eyes, better.

This brings me to a little story I've begun calling The Tale of the Extraneous Hitler!, but it's actually called The Exhibit by Frank Tieri (writer) Paul Azaceta (art), Matt Wilson (colors), and Joe Caramagna (letters) from Captain America #616.

This is a Captain America comic, and it should surprise no one that he's chasing down Hitler because that's what he's done since 1941. However, there is a twist. Just in case you didn't notice Steve Roger's iPad in the picture, this story is set in 2011. Captain America is hot on the trail of a runaway Adolf Hitler clone, but it's not just any clone of Hitler. It's an extra Hitler clone that a mad scientist forgot about.

As a metaphor, Captain America represents the good aspects of our great nation trying to put the legacy of Nazi hate to rest. In terms of plot, Captain America fights many, many clones of Hitler. Look at this picture on the left. That's a hydroponic Hitler farm being grown by Arnim Zola, the ex-Nazi with his face in his chest and a camera for a head. He's growing Hitlers for every day of the freaking week. There are more Hitlers than he knows what to do with. It's The Boys from Brazil crossbred with Costco. He's grown so many damn Hitlers that he lost one, and nobody noticed until years later. That's how crazy Cap's life is; Hitler clones are like coffee mugs. You misplace one because you have so damn many.

Let's imagine how history textbooks have to end their chapters on World War Two in the Marvel Universe.

Adolf Hitler's reign as Fuehrer of the Third Reich came to end as Allied forces and the superhero team called The Invaders secured Berlin. Hitler committed suicide rather that be taken alive; his clothes were burned by the Human Torch, an android that could fly and shoot fire at Nazis. Hitler's brain was kept alive in a robot body by Nazi scientists who also cloned him many times, however they were never able to recreate their wartime strength despite the series of secret South American labs uncovered by various government agents and superheroes.

This is historical fact in the fake little world of Captain America. I can imagine a history major in college doing quite the thesis on the many attempts to clone Hitler. I'm sure some children learn about Hitler clones in grade school and have nightmares. Their parents have to remind them that Captain America will always be there to stop Hitler clones no matter where they pop up.

Except in this story, Captain America meets the forgotten ersatz Hitler and discovers that the clone doesn't have Hitler's memories. Cap decides to leave him alone because he believes in nurture over nature. He won't condemn someone based on where they came from over who they are. That's a very hopeful attitude he takes, but it may have helped if he checked out the clone's apartment.All I'm asking is that you take a little peek in the guy's house before you leave him alone. Just to be absolutely sure.